After a morning of running around to get Kamea fed early enough to get out the door…
to fight traffic so I can get to the farmers’ market in time (which is across town)…
just to get home in time to unpack the veggies and have a snack …
so I can get to my Deep Stretch and Meditation class on time…
and spending most of my time in the kitchen, when I’m home, because I try to make all meals from scratch…
I just gotta throw up my hands.
I’m going “crackers” as my friend, Myriam, would say.
I just can’t keep up with all the scratch cooking, green juices, bulletproof coffees, blah blah blah PLUS all the cleaning that goes with each thing and meal I prepare. OMG – I feel like I’m going a bit crazy. It feels so non-stop.
And, it’s taking so much of my time away from Kamea, as my routine words to her are too often, “In a minute.” :(
“In a minute.”
“In a minute.”
“In a minute.”
“In a minute.”
“In a minute.”
Oh wait… “In a minute.”
I set this great intention for 2015 to reduce my time in the kitchen and make some things more streamlined, but I keep buying too much wonderful food at the market which puts pressure on me to cook it (or juice it) of course – as I try to ensure my family gets plenty of vegetables in their diet. I stress if I don’t make enough from scratch and I stress if I eat out too much at restaurants (or if I make something like gluten-free pasta two weeks in a row). I’m a bit intense. Too much. Damned if I do. Damned if I don’t. You must think I’m crazy.
I gotta chill out. But, how?
My meditation always helps. My deep breaths always help. I let it get the better of me this morning though. But, I eventually let it go – I had to. I felt desperate and shrugged my shoulders because I’ve been here too many times already – no more.
If I want to drink coffee all day, so be it. I’ll have it and not stress about it. If I want a splash of cream in it… I won’t worry that I’m getting fewer of coffee’s beneficial nutrients as a result. If I don’t want green juice I won’t force it.
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That’s it. I’m taking Kamea for waffles tonight.
Oh, while I’m at it, I’ll think thoughts of gratitude to settle my soul <– that’s helpful, too.
End rant. Thanks for listening. (Am I the only one like this?)