Happy Sexy Millionaire

The Blog of Kristen Helmstetter

I Didn’t Think I Could Do This… Until I Used Self-Talk!

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I have exciting news.

Some of you have been following my blog for many years, and you know that I attempted this adventure 18 months ago, when we were living in Portugal. I set out to write a novel.

But things were different back then. My mindset wasn’t where it is today. I did not reach my goal of writing a novel.

For starters, I was in the middle of crossing that sh*tty river of change and had just experienced my dark night of the soul. I was still in survival mode, feeling my way to a better life. At the time, I eyed writing fiction as a means to make money, so my motivation came from a place of scarcity, not bliss. The whole creative endeavor was marinated in stress hormones. Not fun.

But worst of all, the thought of writing a novel was completely overwhelming. I had no friggin’ idea how to write a novel!!!

I loved to read, yes, but I imagined it would be hard to actually write. Also, my self-talk back then was, shall we say… not what it is today. I knew better… you know, don’t speak negatively about my abilities to write fiction, etc. But I wasn’t putting that rule into practice nearly enough.

I knew that I had to believe in myself, but I was also aware that I was starting at zero.

I was wondering basic things like, how the hell do people write dialog? How do they even come up with story ideas? I have no stories in me! (<- that’s bad self-talk, by the way). And on and on.

This must be learnable.

So I took the approach of studying novel writing. I figured there had to be formulas. Strategies. There had to be certain formats, tropes, or outlines to follow for writing fiction, right? This must be a learnable skill.

Remember that artsy guy in high school (all schools have one) who seemed to be born with the Hemingway gene? I knew there were talented people who think up stories in their sleep, while brushing their teeth, or walking to the mailbox. I wasn’t one of them.

If I didn’t have the nature, I’d settle for the nurture.

Could I train myself to be a writer?

Remember those formulas I assumed exist? Well, they do. There are more resources for aspiring writers than you can imagine. So I dove into gathering info about those formulas. I created a schedule for myself. I leaned into it and figured I’d give it a go.

That was back in Portugal. I quickly abandoned the project… without writing a single word. I just couldn’t figure out how to manage writing while homeschooling our daughter, which at her age, was a full-time job. I was also maintaining my blog and any other number of things I could think of.

Honestly? I was making excuses.

I was afraid to start because I didn’t really believe I could do it. I still kept thinking “I don’t have any stories in me.”

But things have changed. I’m different now.

Over the past year and a half, y’all know about what I’ve gone through (the breakdown to my breakthrough), and that I’ve decided to become a happy sexy millionaire. As a result of the work I’ve done on myself, my self-talk is now beyond great. It’s mega-fuckin’-fabulous. Plus, my other secret weapon is that I’ve been meditating with Dr. Joe meditations where I visualize my future…

And all this time, I kept my mind open to the possibility that — just maybe? — I could write fiction. Could I? What if?

Or that maybe writing fiction could be a source of income some day. Would this be another part for the “millionaire” aspect of my Happy Sexy Millionaire identity? Or even THE main component?

I acknowledged that I really didn’t know what to do, but that, to hell with it, I’ll just figure it out.

There are two important things here.

First, in my visualizations, I saw myself writing with my laptop, and I felt in my heart and soul how amazing that would feel to have stories just flowing out of me, and the ease of writing. I pictured myself in Italy writing in cafes. Or looking out over the ocean on the Amalfi Coast.

Image source: Go Ahead Tours

I saw my future where I effortlessly dictated stories while walking, wearing a sun dress and big sunglasses. I imagined myself jumping out of bed in the morning with verve and gusto, excited to get back to writing my novels. I visioneered all of this in my mind during Dr. Joe’s meditations with feelings of joy, awe, freedom, love, and gratitude. (You know the drill.)

Second, I focused my self-talk toward a new goal: becoming a successful author and novelist. My typical Coffee Self-Talk is more general, with a smattering of specifics sprinkled in that address health, love, wellness, money, success, and so on. (More on that soon, in my forthcoming non-fiction book, Coffee Self-Talk — stay tuned!).

My new book, coming April 2020

But now I started adding phrases to my daily self-talk focused on becoming a novelist. An amazing novelist! I was telling myself that, yeah baby, I can do this.

And ya know what?

It freakin’ worked.

Over time, my brain slowly started to accept the idea. Those self-talk seeds took root and sprouts actually started growing. I was starting to believe myself, and was no longer filled with doubts. (Au contraire, as you’ll soon see, I was filled with something else…)

Fast forward to this week where we are self-isolating, hunkering down in the warm Arizona sun while the world grapples with coronavirus. And… I have exciting news.

I’m writing a novel!

For real, this time.

I’ve decided with overflowing eagerness that I am indeed going to write fiction! And I’ve never been more sure or excited about it.

The self-talk worked!

That’s right, the self-talk rewired my brain. Self-talk is a technique specifically designed for changing your beliefs. So that’s what I did. I now believe that I’m a great author, a creative genius, a prolific writer! All because of my self-talk! There was no other reason. Nothing else had changed. Just the words I say to myself, and the words bouncing around in my head.

Excited by this progress, I amped up the self-talk focus on being a successful writer even more.

Writer’s Self-Talk

I shouldn’t be surprised that my self-talk was so successful, but I admit, I did a double take on the new mindset I was experiencing. I was all, whaaaaaa? Holy shit, it actually worked!

I decided without a doubt that, yes, I could and would write a novel. I still didn’t know the mechanics of writing a novel, but I no longer had lingering fear. No doubts. No dread. So I dug into my notes from a year and half ago about writing fiction, and got to work.

My Cuppeth Overfloweth

Uh-oh. Upon opening my Notes application, I realized that I had over-gathered back then. I’d allowed “research” to become the procrastination that prevents actual writing. It’s easy to get lost in the search results for “how to write fiction.” I had pages and pages of notes about plot, characters, arcs, tropes, scenes, beats (what the fck are beats?), setting, genres, sub-genres, sub-sub-genres (yes, there are those), and more… all just half-assedly cut-and-pasted from the internet.

After reading it all, I was still confused.

So I selected only a couple of things to focus on. I just wanted a basic “this is an example of a novel’s structure,” paint-by-numbers, template type of thing. In my notes, I found a potential formula to structure the book. When I saw that outline, I was like… hmmmm… I can work with this.

I also learned that you don’t have to just sit down and write a book from beginning to end. Some authors create a ton of “scenes” (like scenes in a movie), writing them in no particular order and piecing them together later. They just imagine a scene for their character and write it. The next day, they might write another scene that takes place way before the one they just wrote. This flexible approach made novel writing much more approachable to me.

Some authors know the beginning and end of the novel, and that’s it. Some simply work their way backwards from the end, the only thing they know.

I was full of excitement, hope, and novelist juice… yet, I still didn’t have a story in mind.

But I did choose a genre.

After some thinking, I realized that I would start my fiction writing adventure with romance. It’s a genre that I know well. I like romance novels, and because I started reading them as an adolescent, I have some experience from which to draw.

But what should my story be?

Then, a tiny miracle happened.

I was sitting silently, looking at the trees in my mom’s beautiful backyard filled with citrus blossoms. And… I had the tiniest idea of a story.

Boom! Whoa! Whaaaaaat?

Me with an idea for a story? Yes.

But of course. That’s what self-talk does.

(It changes your brain!)

Now, I had no idea what the story would include for all of the different chapters and challenges, but again, many authors don’t know those things when they begin. I didn’t know who the characters would be or anything about them. I just knew that I was using one of the tried-and-true romance tropes, and worked it into my story idea.

And so, I had an idea for a novel.

Remember, my self-talk convinced me that I can do this, and I started to prove my self-talk right.

Along with jotting down a few notes for writing fiction, I was/am also reading a lot of fiction books to pick up tips on craft and get the creative juices flowing. I’m loving the super popular Throne of Glass series, an exciting page-turner, by Sarah J Maas. It’s not romance, but I originally looked into it based on the cover(!) while browsing Amazon. After reading some reviews, my 9yo daughter and I decided to read it together. It does have some romance in it though. :) I also decided to listen on Audible to the version of 50 Shades of Grey called Grey, by E L James that is told by Christian’s perspective (the male). That’s a good one to listen to while taking walks.

So! I had my rough story idea — more of a premise really — but nothing resembling a fleshed-out plot.

No Plot? No Problem!

Then, I decided to also read a book on writing that I’d bought a few months ago called, No Plot? No Problem, by Chris Baty. This would be my one — and ONLY, I promise — “how to write” book before I start writing. I wouldn’t let myself get bogged down again in research or “how to.” I would just write, using the limited instructions I’d learned.

Read this now.

I quickly finished Baty’s book. In fact, I couldn’t put it down.

I’m so glad I read it!

Cuz, whoah… No Plot? No Problem put rocket fuel in my tank.

I highly recommend this book to anyone(!)… whether you think you have a story to tell or not. It’s a fun, page-turning, good little read, and more importantly(!), it’s going to share with you how to just sit-the-fuck-down and start writing.

Turns out… we all have stories in us and this book will get you started.

NaNoWriMo

The author founded the famous National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). Have you ever heard of that? NaNoWriMo is an annual event where writers all over the world commit to writing a 50,000 word novel during the month of November.

One novel. 50,000 words. One month.

Yeah. For realz.

In the past, I could never have imagined doing this. I figured all of the people who participated in this adventure were the artsy high school guy/gal — people who had stories in them already, or character ideas, or too much caffeine. Or people who studied writing in college.

I was not one of them.

Yet Baty’s book tells you exactly how to do it. In one month. (Spoiler Alert: Anyone can do it. Ergo, I CAN DO IT!)

Coronavirus? Sheltering at home? Self-Isolation?

Yes, you know what I’m going to say… NOW is the perfect time!

I’m not waiting until November.

#coronaWriMo

My husband also wants to write fiction. Well, he has written fiction… actually he’s co-written an amazing children’s series called STEAMTEAM 5, and he’s really good at it. (It’s a clever series designed to get kids, especially girls, excited about STEM/STEAM subjects.) He also wrote screenplays in college. (OMG… just realized, I married… artsy guy!)

Greg has stories in his blood, and he wants to write more — this time for adults. He’s way more comfortable with screenplays than novels (because he reads mostly non-fiction), but when I started reading my novel formula notes to him, and mentioned “scenes and beats,” something clicked. Those were screenplay terms. “Oh, now I get it,” he said.

So last night I was sharing what I was learning from the book No Plot? No Problem. And he asked me something.

“Are you going to do it?”

Huh?

Until that moment, I knew I was going to write a book, and I was feeling really good about the process. But right NOW?

IN ONE MONTH!?

True, I have more direction than I had the week before, from revisiting my research and whittling it down to just few items I can digest. I feel capable and excited from my self-talk. And I was ready to put my toes in to the novel-writing pond… soon.

But he asked me if I was going to do NaNoWriMo, as in write my book in a month.

“Like, as in May?” I asked, tentatively.

“No, April.”

You see, you can do the NaNoWriMo challenge any month of the year that you want. It just happens to be an organized program (and competition, with prizes) for writers who do it in November. But the book No Plot? No Problem suggests that you just pick whatever month you want. Sitting here in March, waiting until November would just be dumb.

But I had not been thinking NOW. I was really reading the book to just get a little bit more research under my belt for book writing. I wasn’t reading the book to actually embark on a month long, 50,000 word novel project!

And I just sat there and thought a moment. Then, I said, “Um, well, yeah I guess I will.”

I looked at the calendar and realized I had five whole days to prepare, which, according to No Plot? No Problem, is just fine. If you work from an outline, it’s good to have the outline ready when you start, because each day of the month is for actual, 1700-words-per-day writing. Not research. Not planning. All of that can be done in five days.

Excitement trickled through my veins as I digested this plan.

Then, out of the blue, he said that he wanted to do it with me!

OMG YES!

So we decided that we’d do this together, each writing our own novel during the month of April. Me fueled by coffee (and self-talk!), and him fueled by Corona with lime (because, irony). After all, with our self-isolation, the timing couldn’t be better for diving into a cool adventure. We are literally living through epic times. Why not soak up some of that epochal juju and infuse it into our fiction?

But wait, there’s more! Drafting my mom… and my daughter.

I was telling my mom about it this morning, preparing to woo her with my excitement to join us. My mom has always wanted to write a novel. But she has never had a healthy attitude for doing it. (Wonder if that’s where I got it?)

I think she doesn’t have the self-esteem to do it. And so I was telling her about how we were going to do it and I invited her to join us. I told her everything about the book No Plot? No Problem.

Importantly, the first draft during NaNoWriMo is always expected to be total crap, which is a good thing, because it frees you to just write like crazy and not judge your work. The idea is that you’ll make the book good later, during rewrites, after the month is over.

Anyway, I told her to read No Plot? No Problem on her Kindle over the next couple of days and she would be ready to go. The seed had been planted.

You see, my mom is an amazing storyteller. She has a shit-ton of stories to tell. She just needs some encouragement. And with the three of us doing this together, with self-isolation because of the coronavirus, there has never been a better time. There will never be a better time!

But I didn’t stop there. I drafted my 9-year-old, too. She loves to write. She regularly busts out stories on her own. I’m talking 20,000 word stories, too.

Shit’s getting real now!

It’s not just me. It’s all four of us.

If there’s one thing I want you to walk away with from this post, it’s that there was a time when I dreamed it would be neat to write fiction. I didn’t have any idea how to do it, and I didn’t even really know if I could attain it. I was paralyzed by self-doubt.

Then one day, I shelved those negative thoughts and used my self-talk to change my beliefs. Putting it to the test, I just told myself over and over, every day, that I could do it. I spoke it. I thought it. I imagined it.

As I said before, it worked.

And here’s the REALLY exciting thing about all of this.

No Sleep Because…

Last night, I couldn’t fall asleep until two in the morning because… wait for it… I had so many stories in my mind.

Mind you, this never happens. I never have trouble sleeping. But last night, I couldn’t sleep because I had story ideas!!!!!!!!! For the first time in my life. Stories, pictures, characters, tropes, words, arcs, and images for my novels. My mind was torn open and I was gushing fiction. I kept grabbing my iPhone to jot the notes down.

Wow. Me. Writing ideas for my novels into my phone.

Writers (and other artists) often describe their creative process as “getting themselves out of the way,” like they’re channeling their art from an external source. The Universe? The Source? The collective unconscious?

That’s what it felt like.

I’ve never had this happen with stories. My challenge is no longer, “can I write?” or “do I have stories?” I’ve already convinced myself that I do. It looks like my new challenge is being able to fall asleep at night because I have so many.

I’m tellin’ you, we can all do this!

WANT TO DO THIS WITH US?
WANT TO WRITE A 50,000 WORD NOVEL DURING APRIL?

SAY YES!

If you’ve ever wanted to write a novel, then join us on this fun adventure! Write to me at Kristen@HappySexyMillionaire and we’ll keep an ongoing dialog through the month encouraging each other and sharing ideas.

(And if you’re reading this after April 1, 2020, drop me a line for our next start date — I have a feeling we’ll be having future NaNoWriMo months. Either way, if you’re reading this during the coronavirus lockdown, it’s a great time to be writing. You don’t have to wait for us to start!)

In conclusion. Write Write Write Write Write

I also want to say that I’ll continue, obviously, to have amazing self-talk that my writing is fucking-amaze-balls-incredible.

NaNoWriMo is not something to be afraid of or feel pressure regarding the end result. I am not intimidated or pressured to become an author who writes books to feeds her family (though maybe it will feed them). This first novel, and maybe the first many novels, it’s just the act of sitting down and putting a story on paper. Like an exercise. Every single writer will tell you that the way you become good at writing is to write.

And so if any of you are contemplating on joining us on this incredible journey, then I want to emphasize that is supposed to be fun. You can think of as a hobby or a way to make money. But the bottom line is to just try it and see what happens.

“Shitty/Scrappy” First Draft

Your 50,000 word novel at the end of the month is to become your first draft. And as Hemingway (and all authors) always described first drafts, it’s your “shitty first draft.”

As you can imagine, I’m a card-carrying member of the self-talk tribe, so I’m not a fan of describing my work as shitty. I understand the rationale, and I appreciate it, but still. Therefore, I’m going to take the approach of what another author described as the first draft as “scrappy.” That sounds playful and cute and fun — like a scruffy little dog — with a similarly unintimidating urge to JUST WRITE SOMETHING. There is no expectation that this first draft is anything more than a first draft.

Again, people who participate in NaNoWriMo consider their first draft be… just that. It’s a work-in-progress. In fact, you might add another 10,000 to 50,000 words during subsequent rewrites. This first draft can have fatal plot holes, flat characters, unrealistic dialog, or confusing scene descriptions — it doesn’t matter. That’s OK. It’s even expected. It’s after the month is over that you can go back and delete things, edit, or even start over.

The goal is 50,000 words. Not 50,000 perfect words. If you hit the number, you are successful.

And if you this pick up the book No Plot? No Problem, you’ll learn what to do in the first month to get you from “zero to hero.” Because you will feel heroic when you finish a 50,000 word novel in one month.

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You Can Find Proof to Prove You’re Right for Anything

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From Instagram: consciousness_is

Want proof a vegan diet works? You’ll find it.
Want proof a carnivore diet is the best? You’ll find it.
Want proof your sister-in-law has weird issues? You’ll find it.
Want proof your sister-in-law has admirable qualities? You’ll find it.

We distort our view of reality to fit our thoughts and beliefs.

We filter out what doesn’t match.

It’s called confirmation bias, and we all do it, to some degree.

This bias can be dangerous.

It not only limits us, but it can also just make us wrong and totally miss the boat. Or get us hurt. You can be subjectively blind to so much, which also means you could be greatly missing out.

Your brain does this partly from ego, but also to be efficient and make decisions faster. It’s easier to just believe what you already think and recognize proof that you’re right, rather than taking the time and energy to process every alternative that comes along.

Defaulting to the Good

Confirmation bias makes us less smart. But if we’re doomed to have this bias, then I choose to take advantage of it.

I do this by defaulting to always presuming the good.

I know that I can program my brain to believe whatever I want based on what I think and tell it. I’d say my brain is that dumb — to believe what I want whether it’s real or not, but I’m opting to say it’s brilliant.

I also know that when I say, think, and feel things, my brain will look for more proof to prove I’m right, both because the ego does that (it likes being right), and because our eyes are then open to see all the things we think.

Herein lies your power, should you choose to take advantage of it.

You can choose to think and say the things that empower you, that heal you, that uplift you, and connect you positively to other people. This improves your life. It feels amazing, it energizes you, it opens doors for you, and it creates more bliss in your life.

Or, you can choose otherwise.

You can also choose to think and feel fear, and things that are dark and dividing, things that are sad, things that take your power away from you. It feels icky. It drains your energy. It closes doors to you and impedes flow.

It’s up to you. Really.

Our minds will seek whatever we focus on. If we seek happy thoughts, even for things we don’t typically think of as happy, we will indeed get more happy.

Here’s how to choose the happy route.

What you appreciate appreciates.

Let me write that again because it’s powerful: What you appreciate appreciates. When you find the good in something (or someone), no matter how small that “good” is, it makes it easier to see more good.

Here’s a fun experiment to turn a negative into a positive.

When you find yourself around negative people, just ask yourself, “What are my favorite qualities about this person?”

It can be just one thing.

You’ll be amazed because you can always come up with one thing. And when you do, there’s a lightness, a feeling that’s more enjoyable than the moments before that surrounds you… simply because you thought of one thing you liked about a situation or person. Try it.

A recent dinner party…

We were at a gathering (pre-self-isolation) where some of the guests were less than stellar (through my lens). During the post-party debrief, it would have been so easy and natural to judge them. To spend time rehashing things they had said, etc.

But, why? It wouldn’t help anyone or anything. Trash-talk is detrimental to the people who say it, even privately. Focusing on negative traits (or aspects) puts your mind into negative mode, and then your mind starts looking for more negativity to prove you were correct. Confirmation bias, remember? This doesn’t help anybody. Neither the people doing the talking, nor the people being talked about.

Sometimes we’re even offended by people’s behavior and feel righteous about talking about it. Ad nauseum.

It doesn’t matter! We want to change our focus.

Instead of saying anything negative, try only speaking of the good. Either say something good or don’t say anything at all. And don’t think negative thoughts, either.

If you look hard, you will always bee able to find some redeeming quality about the person, place, or thing that you were going to say something bad about. Shifting your focus to look for the good will bring more good into your mind, and you’ll start seeing more good in your life, in a virtuous cycle that can last for hours and days.

That said, I’m not suggesting you “put up” with rude, mean, or hurtful behavior. We simply don’t put ourselves in those positions! We opt out. Meanwhile, we still send love to everyone, wish people well, and welcome more love and good into our lives when we do this.

Let’s go deeper. Are you ready?

Try this on for size: What happens if you take the approach of assuming that anything that happens is actually your responsibility?

In other words, anything you perceive, any person you don’t think you like, that it’s your issue and not them. It’s your making, your mind, your creation, and therefore it’s your responsibility. No exceptions. It’s you you you.

Gulp.

Well, isn’t that a bucket of ice being dumped on you. Hmmm.

But that also means you have the power to change it.

If you can fix and heal YOUR perceptions of something or someone, you gain incredible power.

You can start by simply saying to yourself, “Nothing is as it appears, even my thoughts of this person or thing.”

Just opening your mind to that possibility will make you more curious, open-minded to possible alternative explanations or facts. You can apply this to anything — places, things, people, such as family, co-workers, your boss… even politicians!

Nothing is as it appears.

Again, think about that.

Look at everything around you and try to imagine that it’s not as it appears. Try that on for size. Think about the person who used to give you angst and imagine that things are not as they appear. You don’t need to force the details of an alternate picture or explanation (though it might be helpful). Rather, just repeat to yourself, “maybe he/she’s not as he/she appears.”

Cutting people slack.

You see, there’s so much unknown. So much mystery. We can’t possibly ever know the whole story of someone’s life. And, no one will ever fully understand yours. So, let’s start by cutting people some slack. Even seemingly offensive ones.

No, especially seemingly offensive ones!

That person who just cut you off in traffic? Maybe he’s a sweet, wonderful soul who just made a mistake. Instead of judging, send him love!

A Life-Changing Lesson About My Dad

In my 20s, I listened to Tony Robbins a lot. I was seeking ways to improve my life.

One day, I remember sitting at a stoplight, listening to Tony on a CD, when he said something that changed me forever.

He said, people are always just doing the best they can. It usually has nothing to do with you! It’s always about them.

This is such a simple concept but rings true with such elegance.

I applied this idea to my dad, who left my family when I was a small child. Although I saw him from time to time, there were questions, blames, issues.

But as I sat there at the stoplight, I looked at my dad through a different lens for the first time.

I said out loud, “What if my dad was just doing the best he could?”

“What if, in fact, he actually did really love me, but he was just living his life the best he knew how, the best he could, using the limited tools he had, having learned them from his own imperfect parents?”

WHOA. That rattled me.

But in an exciting way.

Right there at that stoplight, I immediately forgave my father. It was so easy. A feeling of peace washed over me as I realized that he’s a human being, living life his way, the best he knows how, making decisions from his own heart.

It might not be how I live my life, but it doesn’t make him wrong. Or bad. He is on his journey, living life based on his past experiences and his own wisdom from them. I don’t have his past experiences or stories because I have my own which shape me.

I then applied this realization to other people that I felt had wronged me in my life and… you know what? I found myself in a place of awe. I no longer had any of the old judgment or defensiveness. Instead, it just was what it was. This brought me even more peace, like I let go of a weight that I’d been dragging with me my whole life.

It’s so easy to judge and think we know what’s right, and when we do this, we’ll always find proof to back it up.

But, does believing that “I’m right, they’re wrong” ever make us feel better? No, it doesn’t. It never does. Any satisfaction you may feel from this is an illusion of a frightened ego, trying to protect its fragile self.

Seek the positive. The good.

Knowing that my brain will automatically look for proof to prove I’m right about things, people, and circumstances, I now actively choose to find something positive for my focus.

My life improved the moment I started doing this!

Because, now that I’ve directed my brain to seek out the positive, it finds it everywhere I look. It was always there, all around us, just waiting for you to open your mind to seeing it.

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Coronavirus Self-Talk

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I’ll be honest, I almost didn’t write this post because I’m so tired of cornavirus being the only thing in my inbox… everything coronavirus.

However, I’m inspired to write this post because, as I wrote in the last post, I’m extraordinarily happy in spite of the coronavirus pandemic.

No, I don’t feel guilty or weird.

Succumbing to feelings of anxiety and stress would not help me or anyone around me. Stress does nothing for you. Nada. Zilch.

However, I still have dear friends and family who are upset about everything coronavirus-related. Their fear is growing daily. It’s eating them. It’s impairing their ability to adapt. It’s also setting a bad example for their kids about how to cope.

Their fear inspired me to write this post.

I have compassion and love for everyone, which is why I’m sharing how powerful words and thoughts are. Words and thoughts are powerful enough to drag you down and cloak you in fear. But they are also powerful enough to lift you up and make you bulletproof. Your self-talk can make you smile and soar — in any situation.

Even a pandemic.

How you react is a CHOICE. It’s all in the words and thoughts you think and feel! Do you realize that you’re free, in every moment, to think power thoughts or not? You get to choose. Every choice is a chance to make change. What one person thinks is awful, another sees as beautiful. It really is in the eye of the beholder.

No one thinks that the suffering caused by this virus is joyful, but being joyful in spite of that suffering is how we go beyond surviving to thriving. Imagine — thriving in a time like this. Yes, you can.

I am.

I know it’s not always easy lifting yourself out of dark places. That is… unless you have tools. One of those tools for me is kick-ass self-talk.

Self-talk… my daily drips of awesome-sauce-nutrients that fill my mental, physical, and spiritual tank and keep my bliss unleashed… in spite of coronavirus.

Let’s dive in.

Self-Talk: A Primer

Even if you’ve never heard of self-talk, you’ve actually been doing it all your life. It’s been around for a long time, probably since homo sapiens started talking. Self-talk is — here’s the short version — simply the words that you say and think to yourself. It’s your inner voice, your internal dialog. Sometimes it’s spoken, sometimes it’s silent. Sometimes you’re aware of it, usually you’re not.

Example #1: Really Bad Self-Talk
“I’m freaked out about coronavirus.”

Example #2: Good Self-Talk
“I’m grateful for the food and shelter I have right now. I’m open to creativity and enjoying this time to explore new ideas.”

Seriously, it’s that simple. Start a dialog that runs REGULARLY through your head with positive thoughts. Empowering thoughts. Feel good thoughts. The more you do it, the more you get used to it. I promise.

How Do You “Do” Self-Talk?

I repeat: You simply say (and think) uplifting thoughts. That’s it.

It will change your life if you stick to it!

When you do this, you won’t be saying or thinking negative thoughts. And… um… life gets nice! Better than nice… it gets pretty darn amazing in spite of the shit-storm going on around you.

Self-Talk is so simple.

Simple, but not easy for everyone. Speaking good self-talk (especially saying it out loud) can feel weird at first. However, that totally goes away after a bit. In fact, you’ll soon get to the point where you feel weird if you’re not saying and thinking uplifting things. It’ll become your comfortable norm.

But during the initial phase, when positive affirmations still sound strange coming out of your mouth, the thing you need to realize is that you don’t have to really believe the words at first. Over time, you will! That’s the magic of self-talk.

Is Self-Talk Just Positive Thinking?

Self-talk is related to positive thinking, but it’s not the same thing.

Positive thinking is important, because you must believe that your desired outcomes are possible if you’re going to expend effort (or even take risks) to pursue them.

Self-talk helps you create new, better beliefs, and it strengthens the ones you want to reinforce. Self-talk therefore helps give you a more positive, constructive view of what is possible. And in particular, of what you’re capable of accomplishing.

Good self-talk is having thoughts swirling around your brain and coming across your lips that feel good. You feel uplifted and energized as they spark joy when thought or uttered.

When you congratulate yourself on a good job, or you think you look pretty no matter what, or tell yourself you have the skill or courage to go after what you want — these are all examples of good self-talk. Any words that fill your cup, make you feel inspired, worthy, and whole… those are awesome self-talk.

Now that you’re aware of the difference, you must accept the responsibility that all of your self-talk — good or bad — is a choice. Your choice. You choose to use good self-talk or bad self-talk.

Which will you choose?

Let’s begin… here’s a script to read through every day. Better yet, do it three times a day or more. What else do you have to do anyway while sheltering in place? :) That’s it… just read it over and over. If you want extra credit, then try to feel elevated emotions and appreciation as you read each word.

You’ll see below a list of phrases that I run through, sing, yell, say, and think many times a day. You’ll see some things specific to health, creativity, magic, you name it… all uplifting stuff that makes me feel excited, empowered, and motivated.

I’ve chosen statements that inspire me to do something creative. To attract greatness to me! I have statements inspiring me to move my ass more and not just sit on the couch. I’ve written things about health which boosts my energy and immune system.

Every line is written with intent, for me, and directing my body, brain, heart, and soul with nothing but greatness.

Welcome to my inner world.

Positive Coronavirus Self-Talk

I am grateful for drinking water, food, my bed, and pillows.

I’m a creative loving genius.

I flow through life effortlessly and gracefully because I have an abundance of time.

I believe in me. I just open my heart and connect to everything wonderful coming my way.

Bountiful new opportunities are coming to me right now.

I’m powerful and capable of doing anything I want. I go after it!

I love doing new things.

My color shines and lights up my life and the life of others.

The Universe has my back on everything known and unknown.
I am ready to accept miracles!

My imagination runs wild and I’m filled with creativity.

I put out high-energy frequencies day and night and it attracts that which I desire into my dream life.

My energy is so wonderful that it’s healing to other people as well.

I feel loved deeply and daily. I’m worthy of excellence, love, and vitality. I’m whole.

I’m in awe of nature and the world around me.

Synchronicities are all around and they feel magical.

I love me and I love my life. I love my body and I love moving it.

I feeeeeeeeeel good!

When I’m already in a state of worthiness, gratitude, and empowerment, then I feel like my desires have already come true. This connects my current feelings to the ones I know are in the future, and my body believes it’s already happened.

I am thankful for taking such great care of myself and my body.

Exercise can be as easy as doing some jumping jacks or a few pushups. Once I get started, I want to do more because it feels so great and it empowers me.

The longer I’m conscious of energy of wholeness and health, the more I draw it to me.

I love getting enough sleep where my dreams process my day and and my deep sleep aids in healing and recovery.

My body has the power to heal itself because it’s designed to do that.

I love my body today and always.

My thoughts hold the perfect medicine.

I love reading, writing, and creating.

All is well.

I sparkle. I soar like an eagle. I’m full of life and vitality. Swooooosh.

I tune in to opportunities for health. I feel them all around me. My incredible energy keeps me connected to my longevity.

My immune system is powerful and strong because I feel happiness and gratitude every day.

I breathe easily.

I have perfect health.

I have clarity and I think clearly every day because I’m focused.

My feelings and beliefs impact my every cell.

I turn on my healing genes with comedy and humor. I love laughing.

My body knows how to heal because I direct it with my affirmative thoughts.

The feeling of healing produces healing.

My color shines and lights up my life.

I feel an ocean wave of peace wash over me right now. Woooosh.

My body is a self-healing organism. My body repairs when I am relaxed and happy.

My body loves being strong. I stand in my own power.

Every time I appreciate something, every time I feel good about something, I’m telling the universe “More of this, please!”

I am a rapid healer.

I love every part of me from my hair to my brain to my eyes and face to my arms and chest to my stomach and organs to my legs and feet. All of me.

Love is wondrous because it heals.

My body perseveres!

I’m smart. I’m confident. I’m unlimited.

I’m organized and efficient because this keeps me focused.

I keep my life in order.

I am worthy to receive. I sense it. I know it. I feel it. I stay aware of it all day.

My needs are always met.

The longer I’m conscious of this energy of abundance, the more I draw opportunities to me.

I have freedom of creativity for my favorite passions.

My heart expands with strength and courage. My brain overflows with incredible ideas. My soul abounds with enthusiasm.

So, that’s it, my dear friends. Try some self-talk, change the words in your mind, turn off the TV except for rare updates, and just fill your head with wonderful day-dream delicious stuff. It’ll help you breeze through this and feel better. I promise.

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Why Am I So Happy Amid the Coronavirus?

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I’m happy today, and I have been for the past couple weeks. Beyond happy, actually, I feel bliss and joy.

How can I feel joy in the middle of a pandemic?

I feel happy because I’ve trained myself.

When life has challenges — whether financial, heartbreak, illness, or pandemic — the typical human response is to experience a flood of survival emotions. These include anxiety, panic, sadness, and anger, to name a few.

Despite the current state of things, I’m not experiencing these survival emotions. Which is not to say that I don’t take the situation seriously… I do.

But I’ve done the work and trained myself to maintain my shimmer and shine even during challenges. I’ve accomplished this with specific daily meditations, intense gratitude, and constantly focusing on all the good all around me.

As a result, in the middle of what’s going on today with the COVID-19 coronavirus, I’m able to unleash my bliss.

Thank You, Dr. Joe Dispenza

I learned how to do this from Dr. Joe Dispenza. I devoured his incredible books (like these three: Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself and You Are the Placebo and Becoming Supernatural) and I started doing his daily meditations over a year ago (this meditation and this amazing one, too).

I forever changed my life doing this, because it helped me rewire my brain to keep my eye on the shiny prize, no matter what’s happening around me.

His fundamental message is to maintain your uplifted, elevated emotions despite the conditions in your life. Despite financial problems, despite coronavirus, despite anything, etc.

Why is this so important?

Because you live your best life, attract your delicious dreams, manifest your exciting desires… when you remain in an uplifted state.

You absolutely don’t attract health from a state of stress or anxiety. You don’t attract abundance from a state of feeling emptiness or lack. You don’t manifest creativity from feeling fear.

And so for the past year, when my life had bumps — and everybody’s life has bumps — I learned how to maintain my state of bliss in spite of the conditions. It wasn’t easy in the beginning, but over time, I rewired my brain to a default state of bliss no matter what is going on in my life. Now, it’s easy.

That includes the current pandemic from Coronavirus.

By using the tools of self-talk, self-love, and meditations from Dr. Joe, I am able to focus on the meaning I’ve designed for my life.

This is nothing new, my friends.

Look at Viktor Frankl. He survived the horrors of Nazi concentration camps because of his mindset. He focused his attitude on the beautiful future he saw before him and his meaning in life.

In his classic book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Frankl wrote, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.”

Unfortunately, we’re not trained to experience elevated emotions in difficult times.

I do not take the challenges of sickness, death, or other people’s grief lightly. Yet there are moments these days where I’m bouncing around my house feeling bliss.

When I initially reflected on this, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of guilt. Was my happiness a sign of disrespect to the sick, or a lack of empathy for the families who have lost people to this virus?

Is joyfulness… inappropriate?

But I don’t feel good succumbing to crap circumstances. I prefer to shimmer and shine every time. It sets an example for those around me, especially my daughter. An example to not let fear take control.

And best of all, happiness boosts your immune system!

So that’s what I’m doing.

If you want to feel better, you must choose to think better.

You must change your focus to the bright future ahead and all of its possibilities. What is everything you want in your life? What would it feel like to feel unlimited? How would it feel to have it all? Empowered? Love? Gratefulness? Pick your thoughts strategically, and then think them as much as possible.

That does not mean you don’t ever feel grief or anxiety. I am not suggesting that nobody should feel these things or that I don’t sometimes feel them. To be clear, I do. But I don’t experience them for very long. I don’t wallow in them.

Instead, I let them pass through me, usually quickly, and then I find a beautiful place of happiness. I get massively excited about my future, the one I’m creating.

Because I know that it’s with happiness that I will be my best self. Especially during hardship.

I don’t help myself or anyone else if I’m crippled by anxiety or fear.

I process these emotions by inspecting them. By asking, are these feelings helping me or my family? Survival emotions are not typically helpful. If they are partly helpful by modifying my behavior — such as taking smart precautions against getting sick — then I keep the behavior, but ditch the fear.

You can still be careful without fear. It’s just called “being smart.”

The Skill of Happiness

I do not let fears drive my car. My default is happy, love — no matter what. This is neither natural, nor artificial — it’s a learned skill. I’m now at the point where I’m a bit giddy no matter what is happening to me, and many people don’t understand me as a result. That’s OK. :)

It’s all because of my training.

The work worked, Dr. Joe, so thank you!

You can do this, too.

Imagine how you could live your life with happiness, not only as your default, but your response even when the shit hits the fan! Imagine making fear your servant, rather than your master.

(If you’re new to this blog, start here for the whole cool story.)

Some Coronavirus “Material” Basics

For this pandemic, I am also taking basic “material” measures, of course, in addition to my rockstar attitude.

You see, we normally live in Italy, but we happened to be in Arizona when the virus started rapidly spreading. (We’re staying put in Arizona for now.)

But due to our connections to Italy, we saw the writing on the wall. We knew it was just a matter of time before it hit here in the U.S. So we began social isolation about a week before most Americans.

We wash our hands frequently (remember: 20 seconds of washing with soap and warm water).

We wipe things down with Clorox wipes.

We get plenty of good sleep!

We meditate!

We take LOTS of vitamin C (10,000 mg to 20,000 mg per day in 1000 mg divided doses — read more here about high-dose Vitamin C & Coronavirus including their links at the bottom of their article). UPDATE! Well, fuck me… As usual, information is conflicting. As of March 17 I read from Chris Masterjohn, PhD, a man I greatly respect when it comes to nutritional advice — his latest report that I purchased regarding nutrition and coronavirus advises AGAINST high-dose vitamin C because he claimes it’s not known whether it could help or harm based on the vitamin C/Interferon relationship.)

My Greatest Asset!

However, my smartest tool is not a pill or a disinfectant… it’s a powerful mindset. Special, immune-boosting self-talk, all day long, plus my bliss-as-fuck, happy and grateful attitude. These boost my immune system better than anything else.

Always keeping my eye on the prize — my amazing future where my dreams continue to come true. THAT feels good to think about and I flood my body with healthy, protective immune-boosting chemicals with every yummy-love thought.

This isn’t just New Age psychobabble. It’s backed by hard science (see psychoneuroimmunology here).

So here I am… happy… in spite of a friggin’ global pandemic. I will be eternally grateful to Dr. Joe Dispenza for teaching me how to be this way. It feels amazing.

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The Easy Way to Get Fear Out of Your Life

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Fear… how many of you let it rule your lives?

How many decisions do you make based on fear?

Do you choose to eat a certain way because you’re afraid of getting certain diseases if you don’t?

Do you choose to take certain paths because you’re afraid of other potential consequences? I know I used to as a serial-dieter.

Do you use certain beauty products or vitamin supplements out of fear? (I’m raising a hand here on this one, too.) Fear can be sneaky like that… making us feel like we have to over-protect ourselves for fear of future diseases, aging, etc.

Or, do you regularly live with the fear-passenger always riding shotgun in your life? Always worrying that bad things could happen, like losing a job, not having enough money, or getting sick?

Or how about this one… When you realize how harmful fear can be for your health, and then THAT becomes its own fear! FUUUUUUUUUCK!

Did you know that fear kills your creativity? And that it prevents you from finding solutions to challenges? Did you know fear diminishes your immune system? (Coronavirus, anyone?)

Basically? Fear sucks.

I Have Good News!

It’s time to change all that. It’s time to start learning how to live without fear because fear is just not-fucking-fun.

Shake the Shackles of Fear

Or as I like to say, here’s how I kick fear’s ass to the curb.

Step 1: Take Time for Tea with Fear

The first thing you do is recognize that fear is only trying to protect you. It wants to help. It masquerades as your BFF. If you think about it, it’s kind of sweet, huh? Fear actually means well.

But fear doesn’t realize that it’s not helping us in 99% of the cases! And, unfortunately, feeling the emotion of fear harms us physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It disconnects us from people, creativity, the Source, and solutions.

So, we don’t want or need most fear in our lives. (The exception is actual physical threats. If there’s a tiger chasing you… that’s a pretty legit fear.)

The realization that fear is trying to help us (so cute), and the realization that we don’t require its assistance (so powerful), puts us in the driver’s seat.

So, the next time you feel a little bit of fear creeping up your spine, just think about how it’s only trying to help you and that you don’t need it. Kindly invite it for a cup of tea where you’ll then thank it for trying to help and letting it know it’s not helping. Then, let it go.

Remember, fear is only trying to keep you safe, but waaaaaay too often it’s blown waaaaay out of proportion, especially when it teams up with our ego(!).

We just don’t need fear like fear thinks we need it.

Extra Credit: I want you to do one other little thing.

I want you to say a little mantra every time fear tries to help you out:

“I release all fears. Thanks for stopping by fear, but I got this. I’m surrounded by love and all is fine. I’m going to figure it out. Meanwhile, I’m going to just love right now. I release all fears. Now.”

And then, one more tiny thing.

OK, this next part is a little corny but it works so just do it… after you say your mantra from above, I want you to say, “POOF!” Adding funny little sound effects makes it more effective because your brain pays more attention. (Trust me on this.)

Step 2: Swap Fear for Love

Stay with me here, because I know this step will seem too simple to work.

But, it’s the most important lesson today. With a simple shift in perception, fear disappears.

One way to instantly put fear in its place is with love.

Yes, love.

It sounds simple, and that’s because you’re right — it is a simple concept (and a simple practice.) Once you get the hang of it, everything changes, confidence blooms, and excitement begins, because you’ll start doing new things in your life you’d only been too scared to do before now.

Here’s the secret… When love is in your mind, fear has no room to hang out — not even on the sidelines or the nosebleed section.

When you think about love in any form, you CANNOT experience fear at the same time. Whaaat? What devilry is this? Something so shitty and gripping can be instantly released when pondering something lovely? For realz?

YES. Try it.

It could be thinking about something you love… dark chocolate? Ribeye steak? Your dog? The Beach? Your upcoming vacation. Your husband. Your daughter. Your mother. Roller coasters? Toast? Anything. Anything you love.

A One-Way Road

When you think about something you love, you can’t think about scary things or things you fear. It’s a one-way road to freedom when it’s paved with love. Silly ol’ fear can’t squeeze its way in because love encompasses all of your mind — the entire terrain.

Try it out so we can quickly demonstrate how ridiculously awesome this really is:

Fear thought: OMG coronavirus is spreading, contagious, it’s everywhere. What if I get sick? PEOPLE ARE DYING! What if my shitty healthcare makes me go bankrupt? What if I lose my house? What if I can’t afford to pay my bills? Is that a tickle in my throat? OMGGGGG I might be getting sick! Shit Shit Shit.

NOW: Replace Thoughts. CHANGE Thoughts.

Love thought: I love coffee, it tastes so good and makes me perky. That tree outside is really pretty, and look at those leaves. Gosh, nature is awesome. I have an exciting future ahead of me. Oh, my husband is so handsome and kind. I love date night with him. Kindness is all around me. Steak is delicious, it’s my favorite food. I sure am grateful for a lot of things in my life, I think I’ll list them right now.

See? As I simply replace spiraling-shitty thoughts of fear with anything loving, lovely, uplifted, I just plum don’t think of the fear stuff. For better or for worse, our minds are one-track. So choose the love track more often and you’ll like your life a lot more.

All you need to do is think about love. Love, sweet love.

Think about the love you have for another person or any thing that lights your ass up with love. The fear slithers away in an instant.

Yes, the fear could come back once you stop the love train. All you do is strengthen your love muscle by doing another love thought rep. Like lifting weights in the gym, a love thought rep boosts your love-thinking strength. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

The stronger my love is, the weaker the fear is.

Pro-tip: Do you see what I did with that line above? I used the word “my” in front of love and I used the word “the” in front of fear. It’s another little trick I play. I own the uplifting words and emotions as mine, but anything limited, I don’t connect as my own so I refer to it as “the.”

This is an empowering way to use self-talk and Jedi-mind-trick yourself.

Love Works for Fears Big or Small

Example: Going to the Dentist

My mom went to the dentist last week. The night before going she said, “I hate going to the dentist.”

I shrieked, “That’s an affirmation, Mom!”

I added, “OK, this will sound weird, Mom, but I want you to totally reverse that. Start saying, ‘I love going to the dentist.’”

She looked at me like I had two heads.

I said, “Just do it. Say it. It might feel insincere at first, but keep repeating it every time you think about your upcoming visit.”

She humored me with a mocking tone, “Oh I love going to the dentist.”

I didn’t mind she was mocking, because that’s still helpful even if she didn’t realize it at the time.

Well, I’ll be damned, her feeling toward the impending visit actually turned a bit, enough that it wasn’t stressing her out anymore. All because of changing her word to love.

Keep crowding out the fear.

Constantly thinking and feeling love weakens fear so much that the firing and wiring in your brain for fear dissolves.

It doesn’t mean that it won’t stand up for you in a really important situation. Heck, a tiger might actually appear, I suppose. Or a pink polar bear!

That kind of fear will never totally abandon you and that’s good. But the other fear – 99% of all the other things that mentally paralyze you, make you stressed, give you anxiety and cloud your day, that inhibit you, that prevent you from living your best life… all of that fear goes away.

It makes so much sense when you see that there’s only room for one kind of thought or feeling in your mind. It’s either an emotion of survival, like fear, or one of magnificent uplifted energy, like love.

And, how cool, we get to choose — no matter the circumstances!

Wow, we’re that powerful. Yes, we are. We all are.

It’s the Ol’ Switcharoo, the Smoke-n-Mirrors Act, The Clapper.

You simply immediately think and feel something of love, and it’ll help you feel better. It really does. Switch out the fear with love — the ol’ switcharoo.

Or imagine it’s like The Clapper (that gadget they used to advertise on TV for turning your lights on and off with a clap of your hands). You just think a thought of love and clap your hands. Fear is replaced with love. Seriously, physically clap your hands when you switch the fear thought to one of love. The clapping WILL make it more effective.

Then, celebrate your resilience and comeback rate every time you swap the fear for love. It’s a win every damn time. Hoop and holla your efforts.

Yeah, But What About Really Big Fears?

I understand there are some big fears out there. For example, feeling fear because of having a sick child or finance issues.

I have a question though. I ask, does the fear actually help your situation? Like, really?! How’s that working for ya? Does feeling fear make you or the child feel better? Nooooooooooo.

That’s how you know when fear is legit. Tiger chasing you? — Fear DOES make you run faster. Sick child? Fear DOESN’T make your child well. See the difference?

You know what would make you and the child feel better? Love. Love, sweet love starts the healing process right then and there, because love heals both you and your child. So, even in this instance, fear does not help. Replace it with love.

How about fear about finances? Does that help your finances when you have fear? Nope, it only risks making matters worse.

You see, when you have fear, your brain compartmentalizes, and as a result, the different regions don’t communicate well with each other.

Why is this bad?

The problem with compartmentalizing your brain is that your creativity and problem-solving abilities fly out the window. Fear makes you more like a deer in headlights instead of an explorer on an adventure digging for treasure. It’s hard to solve financial problems when fear clouds your creativity.

On the other hand, when the fear is gone, you find more solutions to problems, including your financial challenges. And? You’ll feel better in the process, too, because love is always more fun than fear.

In our modern, mostly tigerless world, fear is almost useless. Again, it’s good when you’re in physical danger. But that’s about it. How many times does this happen? Never? Almost never? Yet people let fear run their lives.

I used to freak out whenever my daughter got sick, or if I spent too much money. Thinking back on it, I see how my freaking out never ever helped the situation. It only made me feel like shit.

Now, when fear knocks on the door (you see, it has to knock on the door of my life now, because it doesn’t just barge in anymore), I say “Thanks, dude, but did you see the sign? No soliciting. I’m all set here because I’m filled up with love.”

I know, it sounds silly, but it’s really not. Thinking of fear in this way helps you see it differently. You want to belittle fear in your mind, make fun of it. Make it your bitch. Like imagining your asshole boss running down the street naked with a bunch of clowns chasing him/her… once you visualize that, you’ve forever robbed them of their ability to intimidate you. They become a joke to you.

Same thing with fear. Fear is a joke. Laugh at it, and it loses its power.

After laughing at fear this way for a while, love becomes your default habit. When that happens, we start to manifest our Happy Sexy Millionaire lives faster!

Move, but don’t move the way fear makes you move.


Rumi

If you feel fear, remind yourself that this means you’re not loving or trusting yourself or life in that moment. Recognize it and embrace your self-awareness in time to swap the fear for love. It works every time.

When we let love flood our veins, we find answers.

Always keep in the front of your mind that you love you, life loves you, and you are full of love. It’s there, waiting to be remembered and especially so in the moments when fear tries to drive the car. Don’t let it. Immediately think, “I love and trust all is fine.” And, you know what? It will be.

Sometimes it takes saying this ten times, for the same issue, before it clicks. Or maybe it’s once every 30 seconds for a few minutes. But eventually, the fear will slink into the back seat. It might even disappear altogether. Like I tell my daughter any time she gripes about wanting to be better at something, practice practice practice!

That’s when life gets extra bright and shiny. Darkness fades away. Taking command over your fear helps us live epic lives and teaches our children not to let fear rule their lives either.

Love rocks.

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger… anger leads to hate… hate leads to suffering.”


Yoda

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Guess What Happened When I Missed 5 Days of Dr. Joe Dispenza Meditations

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After recently sharing that I pretty much never miss a day of meditating with Dr. Joe Dispenza’s guided meditations, I went almost a week without doing it!

Whaaaaaaat Happened?

I’ll tell you what happened!

I bought a new iPhone, and in the process I lost all of my Dr. Joe Dispenza meditations from my Apple Music where they were stored.

GASP! GASP! GASP!

It took about a week of communicating with the crew at Dr. Joe’s website to get them all back.

What Was Life Like Not Hanging Out in the Quantum with Dr. Joe?

Um. It pretty much sucked.

You know how a helium-filled balloon gets after about a week as it starts to get limp and droopy?

That was me.

For the first day or two, I was riding the high of meditation I’d done up until then. But if there was ever a time I needed to keep all steps of my Happy Sexy Millionaire program running, it was now.

(Here’s Step 1, Step 2, and Step 3 to Becoming a Happy Sexy Millionaire.)

You see, I’m in Arizona visiting family. That means, well, visiting family. ;) And being extra busy. There are tons of distractions and things to do. Oh, and just just for kicks, throw in a possible global pandemic.

And, here’s the thing… my Happy Sexy Millionaire program is paramount to keeping me on-point through big changes, travel, people not sharing my enthusiasm for happiness, and everything else that’s going on.

So I needed my complete program now more than ever. But without Dr. Joe, the program wasn’t complete.

During that week of missing Dr. Joe, I relied heavily on the other two pillars of my Happy Sexy Millionaire program (Step 1: Self-Love and Step 3: Off-the-Couch Immersion). I also did some basic, non-Joe meditations through the Oak app, because I didn’t want meditation completely gone from my life. It all helped.

But it wasn’t my perfect recipe.

I was missing my Dr. Joe meditations!

Then, I finally got them back. I couldn’t wait to close the door to my bedroom and sink back into the comfort of my headphone dreamland. The moment I heard those first bars of the familiar, uplifting music — which I had anchored to manifesting and happiness — I was immediately transported into my happy place of comfort, excitement, and joy.

I felt unlimited. I felt impassioned. I felt unstoppable. I felt ALIVE!

What’s the Big Deal with Dr. Joe Dispenza?

Well, heck, he’s just brilliant. His meditations take my mind to places that no other meditations have ever been able to do. There’s simply no comparison.

He helps me get my brain waves into the perfect wavelength to reprogram my brain for success, health, and love. That is, my Happy Sexy Millionaire life.

The music he selects is perfect. It’s so effective! The words he chooses, his inflection, and the pacing… they’re all an incredible recipe for meditation and manifestation success.

I noticed a big difference in my life without Dr. Joe’s meditations.

But this was a healthy learning experience. I’m better prepared now. It’s a lesson that serves two purposes:

  1. It reinforces the importance of Step 2 (Law of Attraction meditations) for living my epic, legendary life!
  2. I have the meditations downloaded, where I can never lose them again!

Am I dependent on Dr. Joe? Dare say… addicted?!?

I’m definitely not addicted. Addiction is when you keep doing something even though it’s harmful, and these meditations are the exact opposite of harmful.

Dependent? Maybe. For now, anyway. In the same way that Luke was dependent on Yoda for his Jedi training. I’m still learning. I’m not ready to face Vader before my training is complete. One day, I’ll no longer need Dr. Joe to lift my spirits to the astral plane — I’ll be able to invoke that feeling anytime, anyplace, with no effort. And then, watch out, Vader!

But not yet.

I consider myself pretty seasoned in living my epic life.

I have dips from time to time, as we all do. But they’re rare. And when I do dip, I’m at the point where the dips are essentially insignificant. They never last more than a day before I get my sh*t together, and usually only lasting a few hours at most.

That’s because I’ve conditioned my mind and body to whether storms with ease. They’re mild and pass quickly without harm.

It’s an amazing feeling living this way, too. I have confidence and ease in spite of conditions in my life.

But one reason I’m able to do so is that I keep it up. I keep doing the work. Even when the time comes that I don’t “need” Dr. Joe’s meditations anymore, I’ll continue to do them. I expect they will always be a part of my life.

By “doing the work,” I mean that, first, I’m always manifesting! Once I manifest a particular thing or outcome, I’m off to work on another.

Second, the meditations keep me primed! I’m talkin’ tip-top shape! They amp me up daily and totally set my mind in a place that is friggin’ unlimited!

So, although it wasn’t fun being without my meditations for a week, it was a great reminder of how important they are to me. When I had them back on my phone and I started listening to the first one, I was instantly transported into a comfy-oozy-warm feeling of safety and energy. It was awesome!

But I don’t do them just because they feel good. It’s not recreation.

Meditating is actually part of my job.

I’m using these powerful meditations to help me manifest my “millionaire” life. When I meditate, it’s not just something that I want to do… it’s mandatory. It’s not taking hours away from time that I could be using to “make money.” Rather, doing the meditations is part of the actual work. When I’m meditating, I’m on the clock, actually accomplishing things.

Dr. Joe’s meditations have had such a profound impact on my outlook, strategy, energy, optimism, creativity, and plain-old productivity, that I consider them to be a fundamental component to everything that I’m striving for. Every hour I spend in headphone bliss is worth ten hours at my computer.

If you haven’t tried them yet… what are you waiting for?!

(I recommend you start with this one.) It’s a great way to start and end your day and they’re not very long (each is less than 30 minutes.).

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